(Note: This post contains some language specific to Roman Catholicism,
so if reading religious stuff makes you uncomfortable, you don't have to
subject yourself to it.)
I spent the whole afternoon yesterday
at a retreat my youth group attended. It was my second time going to
this retreat. Both times were powerful experiences, but for different
reasons.
About a year ago, I was stressed out about my academic
performance. I was seriously worried that I was going to fail my college
classes and, in turn, fail my parents. Thus, when I went to the retreat
in 2015, I felt a powerful reassurance that things would be okay, and
that the Lord will always be with me.
Ever since then, I've
undergone quite a number of things, mostly concerning Darth's mother's
stance on my YouTube channel. It was all an emotional firestorm, and I
was caught up in it with DFG Hulk. I was sucked into a vortex of
depression and anxiety that I figured I'd never escape. On top of this,
Darth's mother continued to seemingly pester DFG Hulk on his channel,
making both of us feel agitated and wrathful.
Then, yesterday, I
went on the retreat again. I had chosen to attend it based on how great
the first one was. This time around managed to be powerful in a somewhat
different way. I spent quite a bit of time talking to a now 19-year-old
man from Glasgow about what was happening in my life at that point. He
and another man prayed over me, and they both gave me suggestions on
what I needed to do to fix it, as well as reassured me that the Lord
will help me to do what's right. Ever since the incident in August, I
had the notion that my parents would verbally excoriate me if anything
similar ever happened again, so I chose not to tell them about when I
got flagged in late January and again in early April. After I spoke with
the two men, I had a word with the youth minister, whom I have known
since 2013. I told him what was going on, and he gave me advice to tell
my parents about what was going on so they could help me. From the
depths of my soul, I assured that I would do it as soon as I could. At
that point, I had decided that I needed to tell my parents on that
night.
After speaking with my parents about what's been going on, I've gained some new insight, and I realize I was completely wrong about this whole situation.
On
their advice, I've decided to make videos featuring or mentioning Darth
Vigorous private until further notice. Said further notice will most
likely be in 2018.
Here's the thing: The way things are make it
so that Darth's mother has a say in Darth's life until he turns 21. I
won't say exactly why, but basically her word is paramount until that
happens.
Like I said, I've been totally wrong about this whole
thing. She flagged me not out of spite, but out of natural parental
worry. Sure, the incident in August was brash and irrationally handled,
but that was the only extent of emotional flares. Everything else was
done for the concern of her son. Is it irrational? Maybe, but until
Darth can officially have a say in his life, what she says about his
life must be followed. It's just what has to be done.
As of now,
the situation no longer applies to me. I will leave it to DFG Hulk to
inform his parents about this whole thing and take their own actions,
but as of now, the situation is completely out of my hands.
What a relief...
Sorry for the long post, but I just had to get everything off my chest and let you guys know what's up.
~ SpaceGuru5
